18 years.....SERIOUSLY?!?!

It does not seem possible that my 'baby', my first born is almost 18 years old.  I remember when he was born & I thought 18 years sounded like an eternity to be responsible for his life & well being.  WRONG!  Something happens after we, the parents, turn 21-25.  Somehow time seems to speed up & before you know it your little children are towering over you & ready to leave home.  I have so many mixed emotions about his birthday, his high school graduation & mostly his enlistment into the Air Force.  The 1st of those being an extreme sense of pride...HE DID IT, WE DID IT!!  Then the sadness creeps in, sad to see him leave.  I will miss my boy.  Even though at times he drove me absolutely insane, we have gotten extremely close over the past few years.  I'll miss his sense of humor, seeing his smile & just his presence in the house.  It will be a big change not to have him here on a daily basis.  He has such a big personality, it will be an adjustment for all of us.  I'm worried that he's not ready to leave.  That he'll be scared or need help with something & then I realize that it's not him that's not ready...it's me.  I hate change, don't do well with the unknown, my anxiety starts to eat me alive.  I know my son, I know he's smart & loves to meet new people.  I know in my heart that the military will be the best choice for his future & that he's planned on being in the military since he was 5 years old.  (When his Uncle left for the Marine's)  I just didn't think it would happen so fast.  His birthday isn't until May 29th but that will be a busy week here.  Right after his birthday, he graduates on June 1st & then he will leave for boot camp in July.  I want to wish you a very Happy Birthday Trev!  Thank you for the past 18 years.  I feel blessed & grateful to have been able to raise you & I'm proud of the man that you've become!  I love you more than you will ever know.  Please don't forget about your Momma when you begin this new chapter in your life.  :) 

Happy Birthday Jay Booga!!!

Nine years ago Jaylen Marcus Harvey was born.  He was born at 9:47 pm & weighed 8lbs 10.8 oz.  He was the best baby EVER...only cried when he was hungry or tired.  He still has the sweetest personality & demeanor.  He was so excited to be able to go to school like his sissy & brother.  His first day of kindergarten I was worried that he may cry.... I was wrong.  He was over the moon & I walked to the car crying like a baby.  He just started the 4th grade this year & still LOVES school.  He was the only one of my kids that was excited to go back.  He's super smart, sometimes too smart for his own good! 

I love you more than life boogy man!!!

 

 

 

 

 

Wow, it's almost back to school time already.  Oh the joys of shopping for school supplies for 3 children.  This summer has just seem to fly by so quickly.  The kids have kept busy with friends & water slides, Trevor has football practice & meetings with his recruiter.   Yes, his recruiter.  My son has decided that he is going into the Air Force.  So many different emotions have surfaced with his decision.  First & foremost, I am incredibly proud of him.  I am proud that he wants to plan for his future & plan a career...BUT, at the same time I am sad.  Being a good parent means preparing your children mentally, emotionally & morally to be ready to go out on their own.  So I technically knew this day was coming, somehow it got here a lot quicker than I was expecting.  I am going to put on a brave face & support his decision 100% but the day he actually leaves is going to be awful.  I wonder if that's normal?  Jordan is only 2 years younger than Trevor.  That means in 3 years I could only have 1 child in my house.  I can't even wrap my mind around that.  The thought of having a quiet house kind of freaks me out.  That's pretty ironic considering all of the years that I have broken up fights & asked them to please be quiet.  For now I've decided not to think about tomorrow & to enjoy the time that I have left with all 3 of my babies under our roof.  But, if no one has heard from me this time next year....Please make sure that I am not in my room, under the covers, crying uncontrollably.            

Summer time.....

My Baby

We have survived another school year...I now have a senior & sophomore in high school & a 4th grader.  This school year seemed to fly by, probably because I was not the one in school.  I hope that next year takes it's time so I can enjoy my sons last year.  It seems odd that this is the first week of summer & we haven't had even one super hot day yet.  Actually we've had thunder, rain, lightning & wind....ummm, it's JUNE!!!  Things have been busy around our house & I prefer them that way!  Hubby started working a night job & has been playing semi pro football for our local team the Redding Heat.

Demenn #45

Demenn & Bobby

We are still trying to figure out what's going on in the baby department but for now we are content just living life.  We're looking forward to spending days on the lake with family & friends & having BBQ's & enjoying the children we've been blessed with. 

Jaylen Marcus 3rd Grade

Happy Birthday Trevie......

This weekend my son celebrates his 17th birthday.  I cannot believe that 17 years have passed so quickly & my baby boy is 1 year away from being a 'grown man'.  I hear people say that a mothers job is never done, I hope that is true.  I hope I've done enough to prepare my son to enter this next chapter in his life but at the same time, I hope he still needs me too.  I have no doubt that he will be successful & find his way in life but I am not ready to let him go.  Trevor entered my life on Sunday May 29th, 1994 at 10:03 p.m.  He weighed 9 lbs 1 oz.  I remember a few hours after his birth, I was alone in the room & I was just staring at him.  I was in complete shock that this little person was now my responsibility.  Trevor was the BEST baby that any new mother could have asked for, the boy was always happy.  As he got older he got a little more difficult only for the fact that he was busy.  From sun up to sun down he was on the go.  If the house got quiet, he was doing something he shouldn't have been doing.  Over the past 17 yrs we've had many emergency room visits & people have joked that the child needs to be wrapped in bubble wrap & wear a helmet at all times.  Funny thing is, I still panic everytime the school calls or everytime I see him bleeding.  It has never gotten easier for me, one would think I would have become an old pro by now.  I've said before that I've learned as much from him as he's learned from me.  I truly believe that.  I think Trev entered my life at the perfect time, others didn't think so at the time, maybe I didn't think so at the time.  Without having him my life could have taken a completely different turn.  I learned responsibility, unconditional love, selflessness & compassion.  I've made many mistakes along the way but made a promise to my son to learn from them.  I am incredibly proud of who that sweet little boy has become.  I am forever thankful for the relationship that he & I share.  I feel blessed that God gave him to me & allowed me to grow with him.  I love you Trevor!  Happy birthday son!!

Spring has Sprung.....

It officially feels like spring.  With the change in seasons I have a renewed sense of hope & optimism.  Things finally feel ok.  I have a calm & peace back in my life.  Hubby started a new job & life is back on track.  With all the ups & downs (mostly downs) we have gone through these past few years, I have come to realize that even through the worst times & hardest struggles we are always together & happy in the end.  I am optimistic about our future & anxious to see where life takes us.  I have come to certain terms with the thought that we may never have a healthy, living child together but at the end of the day, I am truly blessed.  I have 3 beautiful children that I wouldn't trade for the world.  I have a husband who treats me like I am his world.  I have found love, trust & friendship in a man that I couldn't imagine living without.  I have a roof over our heads & food on our table.  I am tired of letting stress & grief rule my thoughts & take the joys from my life.  I have recently been reminded that life is too short, it can be lost in the blink of an eye.  I want to live my life & create many lasting memories for my children & myself.  What doesn't break me can only make me stronger!!!!

Copper enjoying some sun!

Happy Birthday Jordan Leigh-Who....

Where has the time gone?  15 years ago God blessed me with the cutest little bundle of Karma wrapped in a pink bow.  Jordan Leigh entered my crazy world at 5:12 p.m. on April 16, 1996.  She was 9lbs 4oz of soft, chubby squishiness.  After the first few months of her life, her independence & stubbornness continued to grow & grow.  She LOVED her big brother & wanted to do everything he did.  To be able to keep up with that miniature tornado, she began to walk at 9 months old.  She quickly learned that flashing her sweet little gapped tooth smile could get her ALMOST, whatever she wanted.  Over the years her & Trevor have either been plotting against me together or fighting as only brother & sister can do.  She slowly changed from a little tom-boy that managed to be covered head to toe in dirt, into a little girl that loved girly things.  As she entered her teen years, I could not get my mother's voice out of my head...One day you're going to have a daughter JUST LIKE YOU!!!  Even though at times her strong will, strong sense of self, sarcasm & witt can push my buttons, I am proud of my mini-me.  She is turning into a beautiful & confident young woman & I can't believe she is 15. 

Only hours old...

1st birthday

Dancing on Auntie Lynda's coffee table

2 years old

  

3 yrs, the look in her eyes says it all.

Pre-school

Happy 3rd birthday

1st grade

Happy Halloween

Kindergarten

8th grade dance